Tomorrow Keith ventures out on his first official date with the lovely Jen. Sure he’s hung out with her in person before, but while they were tentatively re-establishing a friendship and before she felt that the open marriage ‘situation’ was totally legit. And so tomorrow’s the day, where they meet up for some beers at the pub before the soccer match and then head on out to the stadium. I have no idea what to expect as far as what might happen at the game, and think he’s being cautious since we’ve had season tickets for several years, knowing all the people who sit around us, as well as knowing his sister’s in attendance at the game, too. In my mind they’ll appear like platonic friends (which he often brings to the game instead of me) and that the making out, or physicality will happen in the privacy of alleys or bathroom stalls or the backseat of his car…
At any rate, I haven’t given much thought to the imaginings of what will go on, knowing he’ll give me the update when he’s home. I’m excited for him, and am having hard time explaining that feeling to friends who know of our situation, and a hard time not telling those who don’t. But at risk of sitting at home and suddenly freaking out I thought that it’d be good to spend some time with a friend. So I’ve scheduled a mama/son and friend happy hour date at the local family friendly brewery. I figure that doing something fun and social with a good friend will help me if I have any of the poor me I am stuck at boring home being a mommy while he gets to have fun feelings come up. Because those feelings surface when I get into that parenting-is-fucking-hard and we have to go tit-for-tat in time away. I don’t think it’ll be a concern about him necking another woman, more that he’s not here parenting when my kid refuses anything but chocolate chips or wants to watch 53 episodes of Curious George 🙂
It feels like tomorrow is the crossing of a threshold, entering a way of being in our openness experiment, and I’m really excited that
he’s we’re getting go through that door, together, even if we are actually apart.